Old husband, young wife

When Nasreddin's first wife died, he married again. His second wife was much younger than he was and they often quarreled. One evening, when Nasreddin came home very late, his wife said to him, "I cooked your dinner two hours ago. It is quite spoiled now."

She was strong, and he was lod and weak, he fell down the stairs.

One of nasreddin's neighbours, who was always eager to know what was happing in everybody else's house, was listening, and when she heard the noise that nasreddin made when he fell down the stairs, she came to his front door and knocked.

"What has happend?", she said.

"My coat fell down the stairs", he answered.

"But a coat would not make so much noise!", the neighbour said.

"Of course it would", answered Nasreddin, "if I was inside it!"

A careful manager

A clerk who worded in a small office in a factory discovered that there were so many files in his room that there was not room for nay more. Also, each file was so full that it was impossible to add any more papers to it.

"Well", he thought and thought, and then decided to seand a note to his manager explaining what had happend and asking him for his permission to go through the old files andto take out and destroy all letters which were no longer of any use.

The next day, he received a note from the manager in anwered tho his. It said, "All right, you have permission to do as you suggest, but must make copies of all letters before destroying them."

What mean of transporatation do you like best?

Nowadays we have so many different means of transportation. For instance, on land we can use bicycles, motorcycles, cars, trains, and horses. On the water we have ships, hydroplanes and submarines. In the air we have airplanes and for a few fortunate astronauts, spacecrafts.

It is rather difficult for me to tell what means of transportation is the most rewarding because I haven't had pooprtunity to try all of them. I think much depends on what kind of trips we make-short trips or distant ones. Based on the experiences I have had, I think that the car is my favourite means of travel. I select this kind of transprtation for following reasons:

Travelling by car is less tired and more comfortable then travelling on a Honda or a bicycle. A person escapes the hot sun, wind and rain in  a car. I think the car is more convenient than the train to, because it allows a person to adjust his rate of speed and stop whenever the desires. It also allows one to regulate one's own time. He can start whenever he wishes and doesn't have to keep to a certain fixed departune time. Then, too, share seats with strangers. A trip by car is usually less noisy and smoky, so one arrives cleaner and less tired than he would if he traveled on a train. I realize that travelling by automobile has some undesirable points such as mechanical problems, flat tires, collisions and accident. In spite of all these, I still prefer a car to other types of transportation.

I would like, however, to have an opportunity to try some of the other kinds of transportation. From what I have read, they look as if they mingt be exciting and good for certain kinds of travel

Lập trình cho trái tim - Tập 13

KKK

It isn't my fault.

What a beautiful!

Have you got any money?

I'm thinking.

Don't forger.

What a suprise.

When will you know your exam results?

I wonder what will happen?

Don't worry!

Shall we go?

I hope you have a nice time!

I've know about it for a long time.

Sorry. I'm late. Have you been waiting long?

It's nice see you again.

I didn't do anything.

Do you understand what I mean?

You look happy. What are you thinking about?

What do you think?

Let's go out!

What do you usually do at weekends?

You're so lazy.

That's great!

Whay are you laughing?

Have I sad anything funny?

No problem!

What you said makes me feel peace in mind!

I didn't realize it.

What happen with you?

How did it happen?

Do it again.

That's interesting!

Yes, I know all about that.

Is it truth?

How is that possible!

I was disapointed with you.

Be careful!

Are you sure?

Yes, complelety sure!

Are you ready?

Everything you said was quite true.

I know you well.

It's too noisy here!

The sooner the better.

I think I'm more the better handsome than you.

What's the best film you've ever seem?

It's 11 o'clock and you are still in bed.

I don't love you any more.

I love you even though you don't love me.

I think so/ I don't think so.

I hope so/ I hope not.

In spite of what you said yesterday. I still love you.

Deny everything.

Listen.

I'll do it unless I don't like.

What is this?

As you know, I love you very much.

That's perfect.

You're late as usual.

You look as if you was lovelorn.

What are we going to do while we are waiting?

Hurry up!

I'll be here in a monment.

Be on time. Don't be late!

You are more and more beatiful.

I wish somebody would love me.

I wonder if you could help me.

Failure is mother of succes.

Not at all.

Let me go!

I'm trying to concentrate.

I've got no money. What shall I do?

I'm not ready yet.

Don't worry about the exam. I'm sure you'll pass.

Who do you to speak to?

Where do you come from?

What do you mean?

Do you feel nervous?

What day is it today?

I'm hurry. I want something to eat.

Let me know.

How much money have you got?

Both of us were very tired.

Do you want tea or coffee?

How often do you go to school.

Almost none.

You are so nice 

Is dinner ready yet?

They didn't even say hello. 

In case of energency phone for me.

Most of people like me.

What that happend was your fault.

Do you still remenber the day that we first met?

What the matter with you?

Why are you doing?

You only a baby. You're too young to understand anything like that.

Come back.

If not.

Who are you? Where are you

It's lucky for me.

Barca 0-0 Chelsea

Top 10 bàn thắng đẹp nhất Champions League

Barcelona-Chelsea: 0-0

Do again

Little Sammy, 5 years old, swallowed a penny. She cried and thought that she was going to die. How her parents comforted he was impossible. To make she become calm, her farther took another penny, his in his hand and pertended that he had took it from Sammy's ear. He said:

Ok! I took it!

Sammy became very glad. And very quickly, she grabbed the penny on her father's hand, swallowed it and happily asked:

Father, do it again!

Precision

A grodessor in a practice medical lesson took a glass of some kind of yellow liquid and told his students:

This is an example of urine. If you wnat to become a doctor, you have to feel precisely both its and taste.

Then he dipped his finger in that liquid and tasted. The whole class was completely shocked. But because of listening to the professor's words, the glass was passed one by one around the class. After the whole class tasted that liquid, the professor shook his head and said: "You are very brave"! But if you paid attention, you would see that I had dipped my forefinger in the liquie, but my middle finger into my mouth. But don't worry! It is a mixed solution".

Mistake

A middle-aged woman had an heartache and was took into the hospital. When she was about to die, she met God...and he told her that she stillcontinued to be alive for 43 years, 2 months and 8 days more.

When be recoverd, she knew that she would live for a long time so she decided to stay at the hopital and took an beauty surgery to reform her face, totto her eyes and lips ,dye her hair..in oderto enjou her ldft days.

After the surgergy, she was discharged from the hospital...When she passed across the street, she was hit by a car and died. In front of God, she complainted, "I think you told me that I would continue to live for over 40 years more?" 

"I am sorry...I didn't realize you". God answered.

Dotage

Three old women were talking about dotage. One said:

Sometimes I hold a little of butter, but I forget what I intend to do: making a cake or putting it into the fridge.

The second said:

Sometimes I stand in a stair, but forget I am going up or dowm.

The last continued:

Fortunately, I haven't got dotage-And she knocked on the table and at the same time said:

What kind of suond is that?

Maybe there is someone knoking the door, let me open..

Mother's word

Helen lived with her elder sister, Marry. Both of them were over 74 single. They had a car. They rarely went out. When they went out, Mary always drive because her eyes were better than Helen's.

One day, the weekend, they went to a big town to have a look at something they had seem on on advertisements on newspapers. Both of them had never come to that town before.

They drove following the stream of moving cars, suddenly they turned right to a street where cars were prohibited. A policeman at the conner whisled to stop the car but Mary din't stop, so he drove his motobike to follow them.

After making them stop, he said: "Didn't you hear my whisling?". Miss Mary admitted their mistake politely: "Yes, I did! I heard, but at that time I remenbered my mother's word" When a man whistles, don't stop!"

Guadian angle

A man walking in the street, suddely heard a voice:

"Stop, if not, there will be a brick fall at your head and you will die!". He stopped and and at that time, a brick felf right in front of him.

So surpriingly, the man was sturned for a while, but then he carried on walking.

Few minutes later, while he was crossing the road, the strange voice came again:

"Stop, if not, a car will passed and hit your die!". He did as told, and at that time, a car a turn near him and almostly hit him.

So embrassed, he shouted?

Who are you? Where are you?

I'm your guardian angle!, the voice answered.

So, - the man angrily asked-where were you on the day I got married?

I thought you caled the next student

A teacher was asking a student a lot of question, but the student couldn't answer any of them. The teacher the decided to ask him some very easy question so that he could get a few right.

"What was Bunker Hill?" she said.

The student thought for some time and then answered

"An airport?"

"No, it was a battle," the teacher said. She was getting a little angry now, but she was tring not to show it. Then she asked, "Who was the first Pressident of the United States?"

The student thought for a long time, but didn't say anything. Then the teacher got very angry and shouted, "George Washington!" The student got up and began to walk toward his seat.

"Come back!" the teacher said. "I didn't tell you to go"

"Oh, I'm sorry," the student said. "I thought you called the next student."

She's already swallowed them

A busy mother asked ther young, son to take his baby sister out to the garden and look after for half an hour while she was doing some work in the house.

The boy took the baby out, and they seemed to be playing quite happy when suddenly the mother heard the baby begin to cry, so she shouted to her son, "Bill, What's the matter with Susan? 

"Because she wants my marbles", answered Billy.

"Well, let her play with a few of them if it will stop her crying," said the mother patienly.

"I must finish this work, and She'd be in my way in here"

"Because she wants to keep them" answered Billy.

"No, she doesn't,", the mother said. "She only a baby. She's too young to understan anything like that.

"But I know that she wants to keep them," answered Billy."She already swallowed two of them!"

She

Lập trình cho trái tim - Tập 12

Kinh nghiệm học tiếng Anh của thày Nguyễn Quốc Hùng

Lap Trinh Cho Trai Tim Tap 11

Secret of the Millionaire Mind-Bí quyế tư duy của những người giàu có

Phần II: Sự khác biệt trong suy nghĩ giữa người giàu và người nghèo.

1. Người giàu luôn tin rằng: "Tôi tạo ra cuộc đời tôi"

Người nghèo tin rằng: "Cuộc sống toàn là những sự việc bất ngờ xảy ra đến với tôi"

2. Người giàu tham gia "cuộc chơi kiếm tiền" đẻ giành chiến thằng

Người nghèo tham gia chỉ để không bị thua.

3. Người giàu quyết tâm làm giàu.

Người nghèo muốn trở nên giàu có.

4. Người giàu suy nghĩ khoáng đạt.

Người nghèo suy nghĩ hạn hẹp

5. Người giàu luôn chú trọng đến cơ hội.

Người nghèo chỉ quan tâm đến trở ngại.

6. Người giàu ngưỡng mộ những người thành công và giàu có khác.

Người nghèo bực tức với những ai thành công bà giàu có.

7. Người giàu kết giao với những người thành công và có suy nghĩ tích cực. 

Người nghèo giao du vơi những người thất bại và luôn suy nghĩ tiêu cực.

8. Người giàu sẵn sàng tôn vinh bản thân và những giá trị của họ.

Người nghèo suy nghĩ một cách tiêu cực về việc bán hàng và quảng bá.

9. Người giàu muốn chinh phục những khó khăn trước mắt.

Người nghèo luôn lo nghĩ về những khó khăn phía trước.

10. Người giàu là những người luôn biết đón nhận.

Người nghèo là những người không biết tận dụng cơ hội.

11. Người giàu hướng đến suy nghĩ "cả hai".

Người nghèo chỉ nghĩ "một trong hai".

12. Người giàu chú trọng vào tài sản của họ.

Người nghèo chú trọng vào thu nhập từ công việc của họ.

13. Người giàu quản lý tiền của mình rất giỏi. 

Người nghèo không biết cách quản lý tiền.

14. Người giàu bắt tiền phải phục vụ mình.

Người nghèo làm việc vất vả để kiếm tiền.

15. Người giàu vượt lên trên sự sợ hãi để hành động.

Người nghèo thường để cho nỗi sợ hãi ngăn cản hành động của mình.

16. Người giàu luôn học hỏi và tự nâng cao kiến thức.

Người nghèo nghĩ rằng họ đã biết tất cả.

11 lời khuyên dành cho thế hệ trẻ của Bill Gates

1. Thích nghi với cuộc sống 

"Cuộc sống không phải lúc nào cũng công bằng, bạn phải thích nghi với điều đó."

2. Thành công là vốn nhân cách của bạn.

"Thế giới này chẳng hề quan tâm đến lòng tự trọng của bạn"

3. Đừng hy vọng làm mà được hưởng

"Một người mới tốt nghiệp trung học như bạn không thể kiếm được 40000 USD một năm. Bạn không thể trở thành phó tổng của một công ty, co một chiếc xe ô tô lắp máy điện thoại, cho đến khi bạn giành được chức vụ đó và chiếc xe đó.

4. Thói quen kỷ luật

"Nếu bạn cho rằng thầy giáo của bạn nghiêm khắc, đợi đến khi bạn đi làm, bạn cũng sẽ nghĩ về ông chủ của bạn như vậy. Nhưng ông chủ thì chẳng có một sự hạn chế nào về thời gian."

5. Không nên coi thường chuyện nhỏ

"Bánh nướng nhân thịt bò không làm tổn hại đến lòng tự trọng của bạn. Bánh nướng nhân thịt bò đối với cụ của bạn có thể có một định nghĩa khác; họ gọi đó là cơ hội."

6. Rút ra bài học từ những sai lầm

"Nếu bạn rơi vào hoàn cảnh khó khăn thì đấy không phải là do lỗi lầm trước đây của bố mẹ bạn. Bởi vậy không nên chỉ biết oán trách mà phải biết từ đó rút ra được bài học kinh nghiệm."

7. Mọi việc đều phải tự tay mình làm.

Trước khi bạn sinh ra đời, cuộc cống của bố mẹ bạn không hề nhạt nhẽo như họ đang sống bây giờ. Họ trở nên như vậylaf bởi vì những năm tháng trở lại đây họ luôn phải thanh toán các hóa đơn vì bạn, giặt quần áo cho bạn, nghe bạn huyênh hoang rằng mình tài giỏi như thế nào. Bởi vậy, nếu bạn muốn cứu bố mẹ mình bằng cách tiêu diệ con"kí sinh trùng". Trong cuộc đời họ thì trước tiên bạn hãy đi tiêu diệt nhữn on côn rùng trong tủ quần áo phòng mình đã."

8. Bạn luôn chỉ có một lần cơ hội

"Có thể trường học của bạn không cần phân loại học sinh hạng giỏi và hạng kém. Nhưng cuộc sống vẫn có sự phân loại. Tại một số trường học, chỉ cần bạn tìm ra được đáp án đúng thì trường sẽ cho bạn rất nhiều cơ hội. Điều này hoàn toàn khác với bất kỳ một việc gì trong cuộc sống."

9. Thời gian ở trong tay bạn

"Cuộc sống không chia thành các học kỳ, bạn cũng không có các kỳ nghỉ hè để nghỉ nghơi, cũng chẳng có mấy ông chủ sẵn sàng giúp đỡ để bạn khám phá bản thân. Bạn phải tìm thời gian để tự làm.

10. Làm những việc nên làm

"Truyền hình không phải là cuộc sống hiện thực, trên thực tế con người nên rời xa quán cà-phê để đi làm công việc của mình."

11. Hãy đối xử tốt với tât cả những người xung quanh.

"Đối xử tốt với những người vô vị, có thể cuối cùng bạn lại làm việc cho một người vô vị."

D$L

Present perfect continuous ( I have been done )

Ta dùng thì PPC khi nói về những hành động đã kết thúc gần đây hay vừa mới kết thúc và kết quả của nó có liên hệ với hiện tại:

You're out of breath. Have you bên running?

Paul is very tired. He's has been working very hard.

Chúng ta thường dùng thì PPC trong những trường hợp này ,đặc biệt là khi đi với how long, for... và since. Hành động vẫn đang xảy ra, hay vừa chấm dứt.

How long have you been learning English?

Tim is still watching television. He's been watching television all day.

Chúng ta có thể dùng thì PPC để chỉ những hành động lặp đi lặp lại trong một khoảng thời gian.

Debbie is a very good tennis player. She's been playing since she was eight.

So sánh I am doing và I have been doing.

I am doing:

Don't disturb me now. I'm working 

I have been doing:

I've been working hard, so now I'm going to have a rest.

rest=nghỉ ngơi.

A wonderful husband

Elizabeth was a  very pretty girl, and her parens were rich. Quite a lot of the young men in the town wanted to marry her, but she was not satisfied with any of them.

One evening, one of the handsomest of the young men who want to marry Elizabeth came to visit in her parent's house and asked her to become his wife. She answered, "No, william. I won't marry you. I want to marry man who is famous, who can paly music, sing and dance very well, who can really tell interesting stories, who does smoke or drink, who says at home in the evenings and who stop talking when I tired of listerning".

The young men got up, took his coat and went to the door, but Elizabeth, "It isn't a man you're looking for. It's a television set".

Present perfect ( I have done )

Thì present perfect simple=have/has+past participle. Past participle( quá khứ phân từ) thường tận cùng bằng ed nhưng nhiều động từ quan trọng lại là bất quy tắc.

Khi dùng PPS ta luôn có một sự liên hệ với hiện tại. Hành động xảy ra ở quá khứ nhưng kết quả của nó lại ở hiện tại.

"Where's your key?"."I don't know. I've lost it"

He told me his name but I've forgotten it.

Bạn có thể dùng PPS với just, already và yet.

Just=a short time ago=cách đây một lát.

Woul you like something to eat

No, thanks. I've just had lunch.

Chúng ta dùng already để chỉ một sự việc xảy ra sớm hơn dự kiến.

Don't forget to post the letter, will you?

I've already posted it

Yes=until now=cho tới bây giờ

Diễn tả người nói mong chờ một sự việc nào đó xảy ra. Chỉ dùng yet trong câu nghi vấn và phủ định

Has it stopped rainning yet?

khi đề cập tới một khoảng thời gian liên tục từ quá khứ đến hiện tại, chúng ta dùng thì present perfect ở đây, Dave và Jane đang nói về những nơi mà Jane đã từng đến trong cuộc đời cô ấy( tức là khoảng thời gian kéo dài cho đến hiện tại)

Have you ever eaten caviar?

caviar: Trứng cá muối

Have you heard from Goerge recently?

recently: gần đây

Ta dùng thì PP với today, thí morning, this evening khi vào thời điểm nối những khoảng thời gian này vẫn chưa kết thúc

I've drunk four cups of coffe today.

Have you had a holiday this year.

Chú ý là chúng ta phải dùng thì PP khí nói " It's the first time something has happened."

Don í having a driving lesson. He is very nervous and unsure because it is the first lesson.

nervous: hồi hộp

unsure: hoang mang.

New words in funny English story

Pants, loose, battle, president, towards, cucumber, reach, court, brick, intending, pale, cabinet, polite, except, responsible, disater, position, neighbour, racket, marble, swallow, nikel, dime, stupid, bashful, pity, therefore, impression, compartment, passenger, rude, tin, hurt, bean, storm,boil,  foresight, forecast, spulutter, curious, psychiatrist, mental, appearance, intend, distance, proposal, dotage, courage, treat, stalk, thorm, method, recover, handkerchief, pocket, polite, sniff, shake, flow, ebb, educated, bite, cable, experience, wisdom, failure, butter, parsnips, fortune, favour, enemy, dangerous, bush, wine, geatitude, noble, soul, habit, bone, feat, absent, present, secret, mind, millionaire, international, bestseller,common, mistake, usage

Leah Dizon 6

Leah Dizon 5

Leah Dizon 4